The news that Japanese pop star Minami Minegishi shaved her head in a public act of mea culpa because she felt guilty about spending the night with her boyfriend and contravening girl band AKB48's dating rules got me thinking. Not, as is probably more appropriate, about Japanese approaches to traditional gender roles and the madonna/whore/lolita trichotomy present in the country's pop music (you're welcome, SOAS students on the lookout for a thesis topic), but about what it would take to get me to shave my head. Having dedicated a whole weekend and a bit ruminating on this, allow me to present you with the definitive list of Things Worth Shaving Your Head For:
1. MRI scan
2. Meticulous recreation of the video of Nothing Compares 2 U
3. Act of sympathy with your cancer patient friend
4. A lead role in Les Miserables
5. A very public nervous breakdown as a result of the pressure wrought by child stardom and unrelenting media exposure
6. Because you have fucking awesome bone structure
7. Because the government cut your benefit and you need to sell your tresses to Hot Hair in order to afford Tesco Value Horseburgers to feed your kids with
8. Because you've joined a Buddhist monastery
9. Because you're Skin from Skunk Anansie
10. Trichophilia
11. Because you're starring in a remake of Metropolis
12. Fancy dress party
a.) Winston Churchill
b.) LL Cool J
c.) The Baby from Shooting Stars
13. A bet in which the spoils amount to more than £50
14. To get on this website: http://fuckyeahgirlswithshavedheads.tumblr.com/
15. Because you fucking want to.
Things Not Worth Shaving Your Head For:
1. A boy.
